Friday, May 13, 2011
Settled Suburban Syndrome
I can see how it happens...the slow inertia of ‘settled suburban syndrome.’ I can see my friends who are resisting it, my friends who are craving it, and my friends who are like me...teetering on the edge of it. I find myself straddling between monumental decisions about wedding registries (do you go with the matt easy to clean finish or the shiny polished silverware) and wondering just how many more times I need to eat pot brownies before I feel like I have really lived. At parties, I find my single girlfriends saying things to me like “well you wouldn’t understand, you’re not single” and “wow you’re out late tonight.” I want to tell them that I spent my childhood surrounded by young people smoking weed and drinking to the wee hours while I slept, curled up on a random couch. I already stayed up late...I don’t have to any more. And as for me not understanding what it’s like to be single...well most of them spent their 20’s in 5 year relationships while I kissed my way across the east coast. I defined single for over a decade and that I understand the hetero-normative lifestyle I lead today far less than the free-wheeling single world. And then there are the married friends who invite Sam and I over like we are one person. “Do you youandsam want to come for dinner?” “Do samandyou want to have drinks?” “Maybe johnandI and youandsam” can go camping?” I think...am I am youand___? And when did we lose the space between our names? Did I erase it?